This Is How We’ve Always Done It” — But Why? There are certain expectations within Albanian families that have been repeated for so many generations that we rarely stop to ask where they came from or whether they still make sense for the families we are creating today. We know what our parents did, what our grandparents did and what is considered respectful. Sometimes that is enough to keep a family pattern going for another generation. One of those expectations is the idea t

I want to talk about the word respect, because I hear this word come up in relationships all the time. “You don’t respect me.” “I’m your husband.” “You should respect what I’m saying.” “Why do you always have to challenge me?” Okay, but what exactly does respect mean in your marriage? Because sometimes what one person is calling disrespect is actually their partner disagreeing with them, defending themselves, asking a question, setting a boundary, or simply having a different

When Your Son’s Choices Are No Longer Yours to Carry I want to start this conversation by saying something that may surprise people, especially considering how openly I talk about family patterns, enmeshment, parenting, boundaries and intergenerational trauma: sometimes a mother is not the reason her adult son is struggling. I know. In today's mental-health world, that almost sounds controversial. We have become very good at looking backward. A man has difficulty in relations